Wednesday, September 3, 2014

~ 14 Things All Texans Have Said At Least Once ~

Texas Flag Royalty Free Stock Image

The Texan language is a complex blend of Redneck, Spanish, and plain English. These phrases are about as Texan as they come.


14. “Do what?”

You know you say it. Don’t even act like you say, “pardon me” when someone says something you didn’t hear. The best part about it is the confused look on people’s face who aren’t from here. “Do what” is as Texan as The Alamo and Pecan Pie.

13. “Can we get another basket of chips?”

This phrase has become part of the Texan language purely because so many of us eat Tex-Mex on a regular basis. When it comes to chips and salsa, there’s no such thing as self control, which means you’ll easily go through several baskets when you’re seated at a Tex-Mex restaurant. Because of this phrase, it’s a fact of life that it’s impossible to not fill up on chips and salsa before your food arrives though.

12. “What kind of Cokes do you have?”

In Texas, we don’t call sodas, “soda” or “pop”. All sodas are “Coke”. You can specify what kind of “coke” you want if you actually want a Coke, Sprite, or a Dr Pepper. Just don’t go actin’ all Yankee on us and call any of them “pop”.

11. “Oh you only have Mr. Pibb? I’ll take a Coke then.”

Dr Pepper is an important part of every Texan’s diet. So much so that we won’t even put up with its imitators. When we go somewhere that only has Mr. Pibb, we’ll politely decline and ask for a Coke, water, or tea instead. Dr Pepper is an educated drink. Mr. Pibb didn’t even go to college.

10. “Stay on the feeder / Stay on the access road”

This one is less of a saying per se, and more of a weird quirk in our state. Folks in some areas of east Texas, call access roads a “feeder” and pretty much the rest of the state calls them, well, access roads. In any event, the “feeder” part throws people off who aren’t from here, or don’t live in the East Texas thicket.

9. “I can’t wait for it to cool down outside”

Without fail every year, summer rolls around, and dang near every Texan in this state starts saying this. It goes on pretty much all summer, especially when weather starts reaching for the stars and hittin’ the triple digits. When it gets that hot outside, you’ll hear this phrase about as often as you hear people say “howdy” in this state.”  (This is always me!)

8. “I can’t wait for it to be hot again.”

 It’s funny that people spend all summer wishing for the cold, because almost as soon as the weather hits a “chilly” 45 degrees out, Texans in all shapes and sizes decide that they’re ready for some sunshine and hot weather. We Texans have short term memory loss every winter when it comes to the cold. It may be because we’re just not acclimated to the “cold” that we see here. After spending 9 months of the year with the A/C on in our cars and house, it’s hard to enjoy being half frozen for a month or two.

7. ”No I don’t ride a horse to school/work.”

 At some point in all of our lives when traveling outside of our state, someone has made a comment about Texas being where we ride horses to school and work. At that point, we’ve had to explain that no, we don’t all ride horses to school and work. Contrary to popular belief, Texas is a modern state with modern amenities, so assuming that we ride 4 legged animals everywhere is only kinda true.

6. “Come down / Come over / Come up”

When we’re telling folks that they should come by, rarely do we give accurate descriptions of direction. I’ve had people from Dallas, tell me to “come down” to their city from Austin. I’ve heard folks from the Valley tell folks from San Antonio to “come up” and visit. If you ever hear a Texan say “come down / come over / come down”, they’re basically just telling you to stop by wherever it is they may be. Finding directions is purely up to you.

5. “Was your high school a 5a, 4a, 3a, 2a, or 1a?”

In Texas, football is king. For the most part, our lives revolve around it, which is why we have all asked the people we meet whether their high school was a 5a, 4a, 3a, 2a, or 1a. It’s a “secret” code that helps us gauge how big of a town that other Texan comes from.

4. “Anything for Selenas!”

All Texans that have seen the Selena movie can quote the scene when the two cholos cruise by her bus that is stuck on the side of the road. When Selena’s bus, Big Bertha, proceeds to pull the bumper off their low-rider, one of the dudes says, “Anything for Selenas”. It’s become a classic Texas movie quote that all Texans who have seen the movie can reference.

3. “Everything is bigger in Texas.”
Nowadays this line gets thrown around a lot for innuendo purposes, but it’s still as Texan as they come. It comes in especially handy when trash-talking with people who aren’t from Texas. Like it or not, all Texans have to throw it out there once or twice in their lifetime.

2. “Hold my beer, and watch this.”

 These are simply the famous last words of many drunk Texans. What are Texans if not people with big egos? Far too often the Texas ego, aka Texas Swagger, leads to the belief that doing something dumb is a good idea. More times than not, those instances involve beer, which is why this phrase gets used far too often. Use of this phrase should be followed by “don’t try this at home”.

1. ”Fixin’ to”

The Texas Legislature needs to officially designate this phrase as the National Verb of Texas. Fixin’ to is one of my favorite Texas-isms that still throws foreigners off. The look on their face when we say we’re “fixin’ to” do something is priceless, and one that never gets old. In fact, I’m fixin’ to find a non-Texan that I can say it to so I can have a good laugh.

7 comments:

  1. All so very true and man I love this state!! It's just in your soul. :)

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  2. Didn't even know there is an imitation Dr. Pepper!!! Good grief!

    My husband discovered Dr. Pepper when he was in the south (Arkansas) with Army Reserve.

    Awwwww come on?!? Everyone knows what "Fixin' to" means!!!! Don't they?????? Well, this Damn Yankee does! :-)))))

    Tessa~

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  3. Didn't even know there is an imitation Dr. Pepper!!! Good grief!

    My husband discovered Dr. Pepper when he was in the south (Arkansas) with Army Reserve.

    Awwwww come on?!? Everyone knows what "Fixin' to" means!!!! Don't they?????? Well, this Damn Yankee does! :-)))))

    Tessa~

    ReplyDelete
  4. Nope, I never say "I can't wait until it's hot again"! That is difinitely not part of my language here in Texas, Pat. I enjoyed reading all the funny sayings, though. xo

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  5. We say "fixin' to" daily around here! Lol! One of my sons had a non Texan teacher one year and she was fed up with everyone saying "fixin' to." She even wrote alternatives on the board. The poor dear. She didn't even last the whole year. Bless her heart. ;)

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  6. Pat, I LOVED this! I got 8 out of 14 and we were just talking about saying "fixing to" last night! My young nephew once asked me why I keep saying "Do what?" I'd never even realized I said it that often! LOL! Thanks for sharing this list. I have to claim a few of them even though I'm an Okie originally from Virginia.:)

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